Can't trust FEMA this hurricane season? Count on the winner of our 2006 sexiest newscaster poll

Imagine a utopia with fake palm trees, its own Will Smith anthem and Shaq leading both the police department and the NBA team. Now, picture Mother Nature putting that paradise in the firing line of almost every Stateside hurricane. It’s tragic. And it’s why the people of Miami have shown love for the lady who will one day save them all—local weather anchor Elita Loresca.

Earlier this year, FHM invited readers to vote online for America’s sexiest newscaster; when the polls closed, we had a clear winner. Since joining Miami’s Fox affiliate WSVN in 2004, Elita has done more than Ace Ventura to protect South Florida. And she has also done it with a better figure than Al Roker.

“People in Miami embrace curves,” says the 29-year-old Philippines-born beauty. “Here, I can wear a cute sweater and still be professional.”

Now the former obituary writer for The Orange County Register—honest—rewards her fans with a sultry FHM debut. And there’s not a cloud in sight.

Congratulations on being chosen FHM’s inaugural sexiest newscaster. Did you know you had so many fans?
Well, I knew people watched, but I didn’t know I had fans. When guys see me out of the studio, they always tell me that I look taller in person and that the camera doesn’t do me justice. The men here in South Florida are so friendly—I haven’t met a bad one yet.

You grew up in California. Did station management put you through a hurricane simulator before you went on air?
When I auditioned, they wanted to know if I could deal with anything thrown my way—then we had hurricanes every week for my first six weeks. I repeated stuff I heard the night before on The Weather Channel; I’d mention “Northeast quadrant” because it sounded smart. I even went to the bookstore and got a copy of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Weather.

Is life in the newsroom like Anchorman?
It is so like Anchorman. To people watching, everything you see looks professional. They don’t know what happens on set. This morning we were singing Nelly Furtado’s “Promiscuous” before we cut to a breaking story about President Bush talking about North Korea

Do you get hate mail from weather reporters in Minneapolis?
I get e-mails from visitors to Miami. They write, “Our weather girls don’t do it like you do.” I’m lucky to have that.

What’s your go-to forecast when you have absolutely no clue?
“Partly cloudy and a slight chance of showers.” That’s our forecast in the hurricanes in the forecast.

What’s your all-time favorite severe weather pattern?
Give me the big one. With hurricanes, you get everything in one storm—tropical rains, winds, uncertainty. During Hurricane Wilma last year, I was reporting by Biscayne Bay and a sudden blast of wind completely threw me off balance. That was scary, but if my news director told me tomorrow I was being sent into the eye of a storm, I’d be the first to say, “OK, I’ll do it.

What’s the one city you’d never want to do the weather in?
Death Valley, CA. It’s the name. Can you imagine saying, “Good morning, Death Valley!” every day?

Why does the weather in Florida make people stupid?
I don’t know. When it rains, people don’t know what to do with themselves. They think it’s time to walk their dogs. Last year, a guy rode his bike during a hurricane and a tree toppled on him. Why ride your bike in 200 mph winds?

As America’s Sexiest Newscaster, what’s the sexiest season?
For us, it’s winter. While everybody else is bundling up, Floridians are showing off their hot bodies. I love peeling off my clothes and being out in that sultry Miami sun. When I’m not at work, I’m all about the short shorts and bikinis. If we could set up on the beach during the winter, that would be a dream. They could pan the camera up to the skies and say, “This is how it’s going to be all day long.