Women. Without them men would not exist (literally). But more than that, they do come in handy, if you need hot food not from a container, your clothes washing, or frankly if you’d like something nice to look at. However... half the time they just seem to get in the way of what you really want to do; air guitar competitions, laughing at burps and farts, watching inappropriate comedy, eating junk or trying to shoot the cat with an air rifle. You know; guy only activities. You can only imagine what life would be like if menial duties such as; work, time spent with the missus, or talking to your parents, could all be replaced by the following Top 10 guy only activities. Just think what you'd gain? And what you almost definitely lose...
1. Gaming
Opposable thumbs. What would homo sapiens do without opposable thumbs? No more peeling bananas, holding tools, hitchhiking... or gaming. Oh to hold a console with such ease as it slots into your twitchy palms, locked in by your cradling fingers. That console was made to sit in those hands for hours at a time. Darwin was sure of it. Whether it's COD: Modern Warfare 2, World of Warcraft or Assassin's Creed, hours spent furiously tapping away on a console, in a dimly lit bedroom, are all hours well spent as far as we're concerned. When the Russians invade, or goblins threaten to take over the world, or a mysterious Italian Mason wants you to 'Knock someone off' for a considerable fee, you will be ready... really ready.
2. Survival Tactics
But perhaps CGI battle simulation isn't enough. When the apocalypse rears it's ugly, civilization-ending, head, as a result of nuclear war, global warming or a mutating flesh-eating virus, we will need to revert back to a more primitive version of ourselves. It’s time to get back to basics and a state of physical fitness that would make Lance Armstrong jealous. That's why it’s totally understandable that men like to sharpen pencils with penknives, climb trees, make fire (or incinerate meat on the barbecue), or wield a long stick like a Samurai whilst walking the dog. All of these things are not only fun, but necessary components of a training regime to end all training regimes. It’s survival of the fittest. Oo-rah!
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