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Were you nervous to go to Iraq for the WWE USO tour?
This was my third tour so I wasn’t too nervous. But my first time going over there, I was in a panic—I didn’t want to go.
Why? Are you afraid of big guns?
I’m afraid of guns, period. I wrote them off in my childhood and now I’m in downtown Baghdad and in these remote places where the average celebrity wouldn’t be caught dead. That’s kind of what Vince McMahon prides himself on—WWE being fearless. But every corner I’m thinking, “I could get shot.” At the same time, there was a chance for me to see our men and women in action. They did an awesome job of making sure we were safe and secure.
Are Army dudes as tough as WWE wrestlers?
I gained such a new respect for our soldiers because I never heard one of them complain—not even the injured ones. And they are always more concerned with the safety of the other squad members than they are for themselves. One guy said, “I got blown up in a jeep but I’m just glad no one else was in the jeep with me when it happened.” I’m thinking, “Dude, you got blown up in a jeep.” I’d be freaking out, but this guy’s main concern is getting back to his platoon so he can watch his buddy’s back. That’s the most admirable thing. How do you top that? Nothing I can ever do would be able to top that guy and what all those men and women are doing on a daily basis for us and for their fellow soldiers.
So what does the WWE USO tour entail? Shaking hands and posing for pictures?
We don’t do handshake tours. We visit the people in the most remote places and we hang out with them, we eat with them, sleep in their barracks and hear their stories. You form a relationship with these guys. I was like, “I’m going to pick up a gun and stand force with you guys because I get it.” I didn’t get it before. Going there and actually seeing these guys was very humbling and sobering. It showed me the grim realities of the price of freedom.
How did the Iraqis treat you?
Most Iraqi people just want to be free and live their lives like everyone else. There are other people who have their own agendas and come into the country and wreak havoc. As far as the Iraqi people who are working on the base? The soldiers can’t wait to take pictures with us, but the Iraqis working on base were beating the Americans away trying to get pictures with us.
Did they even know who you were?
Most of them did. And if not, all they needed to know is that we are celebrities—that was enough for them!
Did you meet guys out there who you thought could kick your ass?
I did. They’ve got some monsters out there. Some of the guys are really, really huge, but even the little guys go through combat training. I’d like to think I could take 98 percent of the men that come my way, but I wouldn’t put anything past these guys. I fight to entertain. They fight to kill.
What’s it like being part of the “World’s Greatest Tag Team”?
Charlie [Haas] is my guy. We really mesh well because we have very different styles. Most people would say I’m a high flyer, but I really don’t consider myself a high flyer. I’m a ground attacker who can fly if he has to. Charlie is definitely a grunt. He’s in the trenches. He’s like the tank of the team. I’m the Air Force, he’s the Army. Between the two of us, we get the job done.
Who is the greatest tag team of all time?
My favorites were the Steiner Brothers from the early ’80s. The Rock ‘n’ Roll Express, that was my very first favorite tag team and that’s what kept me in it for a long time. They were these little guys with high-flying moves. Another great tag team was Arn Anderson and Tully Blanchard, the Brainbusters. The Midnight Express, The Legion of Doom, The Hart Foundation, The Rockers, The Killer Bees—the list goes on and on.
We have to ask—is that really your mom with you in the ring?
I always find this ironic. The general public thinks they know what goes on with the wrestling business. They like to use the offensive term, “fake.” So if you think what we do is staged then why would you think that’s my real mom?
Do you ever get a storyline that you hate?
Yes. Everyone at some point in their career is going to run into something they’re not very fond of. Luckily, you have the option to say, “I’m not going to do it.” A lot of people exercise that choice. You have the choice to say no or at least give your opinion. But you’ll be a better performer if you can pull off something you didn’t like.
You look like you spend 20 hours a day bench pressing Hondas. What’s your training schedule like?
You may have to find another superstar to answer that question because I am notorious for not working out, not watching my diet, nothing. In 2006 I worked out a grand total of eight times.
Are you lying or are you just superhuman?
I like to think that since I played three sports in high school and three sports in college, 10 years of consistently working out set my body on autopilot.
How do you execute some of your moves and not break your neck?
Well, sometimes they do—just ask Edge or Benoit. The injuries happen. Unfortunately, you can’t plan for injuries. The best you can do is to learn the moves properly. The most important thing is not to try to exceed your limitations. I can do everything I’ve ever seen, but there’s a lot of it I simply won’t try. I’m a big guy. There are things that don’t make sense for me to do. Other things, while I can do it, I’m not sure I can execute a landing safely. To me, if it’s 50/50 then it’s out.
What happens when you get hurt in the middle of the match?
If someone gets hurt in the ring, the first thing we do is assess just how bad the damage is. No one says “time out.” We’ll find a way to keep going. We’ll talk to each other, but 90 percent of the time you just keep going. Everyone I’ve ever seen injured in a match has finished the match. Bob Holly had his arm broken in half in the middle of a match and he just kept going. Pro wrestlers are not like football players or basketball players or any other athletes. When we get hurt we still want to work.
Have you ever had to shut somebody down in a bar fight?
One of our former champions got into a situation at a bar where, basically, a guy wanted to fight him over his girlfriend. He had been drinking and wrestlers tend not to back down. But at this point I’m thinking, “I can’t let him fight”—I had to protect the business. I basically shoved him out of the way and said, “If you’re fighting anyone, you’re fighting me.” We’re professionals, we’re role models and people pay attention to what we do. If at all possible I will talk my way out of a fight. But if a situation escalates to a point where someone has to fight, I plan on winning.
So did the guy step up?
No, I bluffed him. You hang around this business enough and you learn the gift of gab: “If you fight, you’re going to find out what it feels like to be completely helpless because I’m going to ball your ass up and tie you in knots.” The guy had what I call, “Dog behind the fence syndrome.” When the dog is on the other side of the fence, he’ll bark. As long as the bouncers are right there, he was ready to fight. But when the bouncers let go he shut right up.
Say you don’t have a WWE Championship belt to flash in someone’s face—how can the average guy win a bar fight?
Always have the cooler hand and avoid getting physical if you can. If not, the first thing you do is get really loud. No matter what happens, you want witnesses. You get loud and no matter the outcome, everyone knows who deserved it and why. Make sure you’re saying, “Keep your hands off me!” so people know you didn’t want to fight. Give the bouncers time to get there by stalling as much as possible. If it comes down to blows, then fight to the last.
What’s the best move? Bitch slap? Eye poke?
If someone grabs you by the neck the first thing you do is pull away and let them keep their hands on you. You want them to straighten out their arms. Then, put your hand on top of theirs to hold it in place, and with the other, ram the underside of their elbow. No matter how big you are, a little bit of pressure will pop your elbow out. They’ll think twice before coming after you again.
Shelton can be seen on WWE’s Raw Mondays at 9 pm. |
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